Strange Dreams

I guess I have a sleep disorder. I've had it all my life. It's more of a dream disorder maybe. I don't even know how to explain it. There is something in your body that stops your body from moving during dreams soo that you don't hurt yourselves. People who sleepwalk or have night terrors don't produce enough of this chemical I suppose. The problem with me is I have too much of that sometimes. So when I'm ready to wake up, my brain wakes up, but I can't move my body. I know, it sounds wierd. It's really scary though. I have really realistic dreams, often times they are scary. The dream itself can be frightening, but when I realize that I'm dreaming and I want to wake up, but I can't, well that's really really disturbing. I want to get away from whoever is chasing me, or whatever is bothering me, but I can't wake up. It's almost like I lift out of my body and can see myself dreaming. I try to move my body, to wiggle my fingers, but I'm jsut stuck. It's this fierce power struggle, with myself just to wake up. And eventually I do wake up, but my body is really tired from the fight to revive, and I often fall back asleep involuntarily. Then go through the whole process again. This is what happened this Sunday afternoon. It was really hot, 104F. I've noticed I have these dreams the most when it's hot. The heat knocked us off our feet, all of us. My two boys took a nap, at the same time, which is a miracle. So Dh and I laid on the couch and drifted off. I had one of these episodes, so I didn't wake up very refreshed at all. M played with the nieghbor a little bit. We picked up some pictures at Sears. Nothing really exciting. Maybe next week I'll get a good nap. Or have a more exciting weekend. We can always hope.